29 January 2008

"Oriental Prince in the Land of Soup"

A few weeks ago, a friend was in town for a visit. We spent an afternoon in a coffee shop in each other's company. I worked through the Jonesin' Crossword while she was occupied with writing no fewer than 80 thank you notes for her generous students and distant family members. Being a resourceful lass, she had found a fail proof formula for writing an appropriate thank you note in six easy steps. I believe her guide comes from The Morning News, but I'll recapitulate it here:
  1. Greet the giver
  2. Thank the giver
  3. Discuss use
  4. Refer to recent and upcoming interactions
  5. Repetition of gratitude
  6. Salutation
I didn't have reason to use the formula at the time. For once I had written my holiday thank you notes promptly and, although I have not bothered to mail them yet, I did not feel that my notes strayed too far from this guide. Admittedly, I do bend the rules a bit on number four because, quite frankly, I enjoy talking about me. Today, however, I finally found a suitable occasion to put the formula to use.

Dear Miso Soup,

Thank you for burning my tongue tongue today. Your gift really caught me by surprise! I was not expecting more than the pleasure of your delicious company. You really outdid yourself when you scalded the roof of my mouth as well. Your generosity and kindness is greatly appreciated, O cloudy and salty broth of yum.

How did you know that I have low-tolerance to heat? All day I've been particularly sensitive to the sensation of creating important consonant phonemes. Also, I really did not want to enjoy the rest of my lunch or anything else I attempted to eat. I plan to use the burnt tongue to consider what it might be like to have fur instead of taste buds.

I'd been looking forward to our visit since I first thought that your company might rouse me from the quasi-hypothermic state induced by my drafty and cold apartment. I look forward to seeing you again soon. Perhaps we shall run into each other the next time I have a hankering for sashimi, donburi, or combination Bento box lunch.

Thank you once again for your generous gift.

With Regards,

K. Crow

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